By: Muhammad Ali Azlan
Long ago in a distant land I, Aku, the shape-shifting Master of Darkness, unleashed an unspeakable evil! But a foolish Samurai warrior wielding a magic sword stepped forth to oppose me. Before the final blow was struck, I tore open a portal in time and flung him into the future, where my evil is law!
I apologize, got carried away a little, I assure you that this is a very serious piece of writing.
Envision a Utopia, Lakes of milk and honey, clean walls without the mandatory Viagra Ads and testosterone boosters or Hakeem Sahab’s magic potions and Aamil Baba’s voodoo, A mass transit system, subways, bullet trains and multi-colored railway carriages along with aesthetically pleasing metro buses, FREE WIFI FOR ALL everywhere and anywhere, Hybrid cars, clean roads without the usual bumps and thumps, the ditches and the trenches, greenery everywhere, pure drinking water for all, free electricity, I mean to say imagine a heaven on earth and then Imagine that heaven to be Pakistan, that will be the fate of this forsaken land after it’s rightful heir ascends upon the throne and adorns the crown of thorns and take us into the future on his mighty chariot.
Now for the grand revelation, the secret has been revealed to me by a mystic gargoyle who whispered in my ear, reminiscent of a little birdie owned by a famous talk show host (former), currently that guy is looking to destroy a cherished sport but that topic is to be debated upon on another day.
Without further ado…
Dr. Moazzam Mahmood Niazi, The leader you all need, the leader you all crave, the leader you all clamor for, your payers answered and certainly the leader we all deserve. ALL HAIL!!!
This handsome adonis of a man who can slay and woo anyone with his charm and wit will surely prove to be an asset in the United Nations, given his charisma factor which blows off the roof and his oratory skills which certainly are unparalleled.
He is for the people and from the people, he is not the man to shy away from stirring up controversy, he believes in taking risks and speaking his mind not caring about the consequences, he stands for justice, equality, straightforwardness, boldness, character, dignity, valor and courage. He believes in Ideals before politicking and diplomacy, he is a man who feels the nations pain as his own and will make you nostalgic with his Bhutto-esque paper tearing speech in the United Nations General Assembly.
He speaks from the heart, without filters and barriers and conveys the message which is the voice of the voiceless rather than beating around the bush.
He is a man of great honesty and Integrity.
Hear the lion roar below.
He has been kind enough to share a bit of his manifesto which is an all encompassing document in it’s entirety which will ultimately end world hunger and promote world peace but the Great Moazzam Niazi knows that everything takes it’s sweet time so he believes in taking baby steps, he has been kind enough to share a gist of his revolutionary manifesto which can be read below
PAKISTAN AMAN LEAGUE, you better not forget that name and that beautiful face.
With a broom in hand which also doubles as the good doctors transportation and daily commuting mechanism, he has promised to sweep the elections this time.
In a recent clip he has promised to produce electricity from the sun which will also produce sugar as it’s by product naming the revolutionary claim as “2 in 1” which he himself seems to be, an excellent public speaker with a breathtaking personality.
The future is bright and prosperous for the scientist and his trailblazing political party who are striving for a positive change in Pakistan. May, God be with them and may they turn out to be victorious, I have never been this happy about having an ID card as I am nowadays, can’t wait for the elections to come where I can go and vote for the future of Pakistan and a potentially great leader like Dr. Muhammad Moazzam Mahmood Khan Niazi.
To get you in the spirit of the elections I leave you with the official Anthem so that you may be charged in time and vote for the righteous and infallible, Chairman Aman League *Inserts heart emoji*